“The thing is, falling head over heels often results in me landing flat on my face…”

I Think He's Gone Weird

My phone buzzed at 11pm, as I was in bed halfway through a mini quarter-life crisis. “Hey xx” he said. I thought of my mum at this age, she was married with a baby and had zero fuckboys texting her after dark. I also thought about family members who ask if I have a boyfriend anytime I see them… how does one explain the “Hey xx” situations, and why should we have to anyway?

I’ll be turning 25 in January and my progress with relationships up until this point has been a thoroughly enjoyable journey of entertainment for those around me. The ones I’ve loved have come and gone, holidayed with girlfriends, moved in together, moved out, moved on, and sometimes, as I re-downloaded Tinder for the millionth time, it felt like I wasn’t moving at all.

The thing is, falling head over heels often results in me landing flat on my face, literally. I cannot love without disaster, for some reason it sticks with me like my favourite full-coverage foundation on a night out. My heart is full of the classic one-liners I’ve been dumped with, cringey times I got a bit too honest while on the pink gin, and a load of romanticised pricks that I’ve no idea why I fell for in the first place.

When it comes to love, I feel totally lost and completely revitalised all at the same time. There isn’t a direct path to romance and the one, and to summarise my twenty-something life, it’s like I’m super excited, skipping down the yellow brick road, yet I keep attracting a load of flying monkeys. But on the plus side, I’m wearing fab shoes and really love my dog, you know?

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