Tuesday, 20 October 2015

'Psycho' - Fact Or Fiction?

'You're a psycho': The three little words that have the ability to make a woman's blood boil and prove the statement 100% correct. I'm sure you've been there my friend. The only way to fix the damage caused by this statement is to replace it with three other words which will definitely not be said back to you at this point. No I do not love you right now, but I do love giving you this death stare while watching you make me food to start to make up for it, so please get on that ASAP. The truth is one of two options- either no woman is a psycho, or all women are psychos.

 I have looked up the word psychopath in the urban dictionary and here are the results: "Psychopath: A person with an antisocial personality disorder, manifested in aggressive, perverted, criminal, or amoral behavior without empathy or remorse. Psychopaths tend to lack normal human emotions such as guilt. They are also often highly intelligent and skilled at manipulating others. Also, psychopaths seem to appear normal. You would probably never guess there was something wrong with them. Note, not all psychopaths are serial killers."

Granted some of it is the truth, yes we may be highly intelligent and skilled at manipulating others but we wouldn't have had so much practise at this skill if men were more wise to the way we think and feel. What is so hard to understand about our desire for attention 24/7, the way we hint instead of saying things straight out and the way "I'm fine" means you need to investigate into the very depths of my soul to find out what you've done wrong in the past three seconds? Is this not all simple science? And yes, we do appear normal even though underneath we're SLIGHTLY insecure, jealous, way too good at creeping, and emotionally unstable...but who isn't, eh? And as for being aggressive, well, let's save discussing that one for another day shall we? But if it helps, according to the statement above we're not all serial killers, so surely that's always a plus!

When men call us psychos do they not realise they've probably unleashed this monster? I didn't want to show you this side until at least three months into our relationship, but hey, you've pushed me to the limit by not scrolling past her profile picture quick enough and with that constant irritating clicking you keep doing... could you not?

Like I said before, either no woman is a psycho and men over-exaggerate our anger, or all women are psychos and we were built this way to cope with living in a world full of clueless, airheaded, yet very beautiful male creatures. If you think your girl is a psycho then you've obviously done something that is not acceptable behaviour in the world of women and you've managed to get yourself into an awful situation that is hitting at least 8.9 on the female Richter Scale. At this point you can either go and find shelter in a far away place (until the earthquake spreads, which it will, you can't escape this) or face it head on right now and risk being knocked out by some flying object (likely scenario...) Good luck, see you on the other side. Hopefully. 


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